Well, my friend has responded and I've replied to clarify my point of view. After a cooling off period we will I'm sure be able to resume seeing each other, but certainly with trepidation on my part. I've told her I'll consider any plan tentative and feel free to cancel at the last minute. If she wants or needs that flexibility, I expect to have that option as well.
She is flaky at times, and yet the more she's been insensitive, the more she feels entitled to be, so I drew a boundary. She's one of those people who does not accept others' boundaries without a fight. A few months ago she insisted she didn't need a wear a seat belt and I refused to start my car until she did. She tested me on several more occasions, and I sat there without moving until she buckled up. What that is all about I have no idea, but she clearly wants to "be the boss of her own self"!
I have a wide variety of friends, and she and I share some interests that I value, so we'll see how a more cautious approach on my part feels when next we meet. I don't know yet if this is a deal breaker or a bump in the road. But my trust is eroded, and this may be a whole different road we now travel, or, we will be driving in separate cars from now on.
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