This morning after meditation and a dharma talk, my friend and discussed what right speech to utilize for her to reconnect with a friend with whom she recently had a falling out. We discussed various wordings for a short note to have the other person realize she is missed and that my friend would like to clear the air and resume the friendship. It's an important one to her, and it's disturbing to have a rift. I described to her how I am writing this blog and therefore thinking a lot about skillful speaking. I'm noticing little things I used to not see. How talking about feelings and owning my own is better speech than guessing at another's feelings, motivations or intentions. I told her to me it's like closing or opening a door. If you aren't careful your speech will cause a reaction that closes the door to the other person hearing you or talking with you. You need to keep the door open if the refreshing breeze is to cool down the both of you. Shut down or open up. It's pretty simple, but takes a lot of awareness to know the keys to each.
I was proud that I was able to be of help and she left determined to reestablish contact with her friend. I was, in a small way, encouraging a healing. I like that.
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