I'm needing to lose weight, and my friend and I joined WW several days ago. When I am alert to what I eat and my desires around eating I confront a whole host of issues. My mother badgered me as a teenager about my weight, even though I was slim. I didn't have her height or body, and she made it clear she feared I would turn out like her mother: short and stocky. I look the most like my grandmother of any of my many cousins. So body image comes up. I feel like a failure. Then there is using food as the highlight of my day instead of other events. I reward myself with food. Also there is fear, because I've lost the weight several times since I turned forty and developed Graves disease, and with my medications it comes right back if I eat bread or have too much fruit. Hopelessness is the result of this fear.
So what right speech do I need to encourage myself with? Well, working through issues with my therapist is a help. Reminding myself that my mother was slim mainly because she smoked like a chimney. She also drank like a fish, to double the cliche usage. I can get out more and do things with friends, so the pleasure I remember at the end of the day is about a nice walk or talk. I can try to listen to my doctor who is telling me I only have to lose half pound a week. That's not so daunting. And I need to decide I must eat wisely from here on out or I will be contributing majorly to my health problems.
There. I've argued with myself persuasively. Now I will endeavor to remain awake throughout the day, and find my joy from people, nature and reading and writing. Food needs to be more of a footnote and less of a highlight.
No comments:
Post a Comment