Well, I went to the dermatologist and had to have a biopsy. Never good news, and one more thing to worry about. I'll probably have to have a hunk cut out after the wedding. But I didn't get upset, and that is because my dermatologist is so skillful about how she tells me things, and her calmness rubs off on me. We ended up joking about the wedding while she was slicing a piece of skin for the biopsy. She's good natured and upbeat, as is all her staff. Yet she never "protects" me from the truth. I trust her. Is it the words she uses? Could be. But it's probably more tone, expression and an unflapability that makes it easy for me to hear what she says without panicking. She's intuitive, and you feel she genuinely likes you cares about you.
So maybe this right speech thing is about something deeper: intention. She seems compassionate and focused on me because that is her nature. She's not thinking of something else, distracted or dismissive. And probably it is true that holding that intention for attention and compassion causes what comes out of the mouth to be more skillful and kind. I'm not saying she's a practicing Buddhist, because kindness and compassion aren't owned by one practice or religion. Many people throughout the world are attempting to treat others kindly, as they would wish themselves treated. But to me she's a Bodhisatva of compassion, and she makes the pain feel bearable and that I am not alone on my journey.
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