I have to go to the DMV today to fail my vision test, turn in the eye doctor's form and get another appointment for a driving test. I'm stressed out, and gloomy. I'm wearing a black shirt if that gives you the picture. My husband offered to drive me there for moral support and at first I turned him down, but then thought, what the heck, I could use some moral support or tranquillizers or a new brain. This is me accepting help: desperation. Now I'm superstitious about his coming: will it be good luck or bad luck? Will a black cat cross my path? This is the degree of my irrationality.
I can tell myself I'll get around on buses and walk more which would be good for me. But I want the freedom of driving myself by myself, if the truth be told. I'll hope things go well, so that I can get all hysterical again when I have the driving test, which is long and difficult, as it ought to be. I drive fine normally, but there are so many ways to blow the test; let me not count them lest I go ballistic. It's a good thing to accept support, isn't it? I'm clinging to that idea. My character is improving even if my eyesight is not.
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