I've just come back from an hour and a half walk with a friend. And it has occurred to me that we spent half the time talking about cancer and illnesses of friends and the other half about upcoming trips we are making. She and her whole family are going on a sailing trip to the Carribean for her husband's birthday and I was discussing my husband and my plans for our anniversary and also a trip two friends and I are taking to the southwest in a couple of months. So our lives could fairly be said to be split between health scares of our friends, family and ourselves and the escapism possible at our age due to retirement and time. We are holding our family and friends close at the same time we are realizing our time with them and them with us is finite.
How to keep the joy in living when we are aging and experiencing loss more frequently? My friend and I do it by instinct, not calculation, but there it always is: the elephant in the room. We also share our losses and fears, which doesn't transform anything, yet somehow makes the pain more bearable. We are not alone. We are able to comfort each other.
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