One of my relatives from my first marriage has died, in Fiji, and I bought sympathy cards to send. It takes some time to buy any card, but especially I feel it is important to choose wisely when it is a condolence message. I don't like flowery, I don't want too much verbage, just the basics, and I would like the front of the card to be quietly beautiful. For this card there are cultural differences that must be taken into account and also differing religions. I want to be sensitive.
Perhaps it seems silly to be thinking so carefully about a card, but in Buddhist practice we pledge to take the utmost kindness and care in all things, including pouring tea, washing dishes, vacuuming, and sending messages. I believe in cards, which identifies me immediately as a geezer, but what they represent to me is effort, right effort, it is called in Buddhism.
Something to hold in your hand, even a lowly card, is a token of feeling. I appreciate it, and I think most people still do, even if they don't take the time to send one. Cards comfort when people are far apart. The habit may have eroded, but to a lot of us, is still appreciated.
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