Wandering Along the Path: Right Speech

Today I watched the ceremony for my Zen teacher's cremation. On Zoom. It was not the same as being there. Not in any way. The camera was not good, the sound was sometimes un-understandable, and there was a lot of restlessness among the six or so people present. Surreal is how I would describe it. Yet, I think my teacher would have been amused, or maybe was, who knows? She could be a stickler for ritual, but also goofy and irreverent. They filled her box with flowers from her garden and her daughter's, and I know she loved that. I sent a picture of her and her husband last year, before he died, and also blessings I wrote. I asked her to take care of my daughter who died as well. Afterward, I was very hungry and ate a big lunch. My husband came out to the studio a while ago and asked if I was sad, which was nice of him. I said no and meant it. She's in nirvana now, or close to it, and with her beloved husband and has avoided years of Alzeimer's and needing a caretaker. She lived until a couple of weeks of her 85th birthday. She had an extraordinary life, inspired many people, and was loved by many. I have a million memories to cherish, and her voice in my head when I'm unsure of how to speak or act. She hasn't left me. Not at all.