I had a funny conversation with my eye doctor today. They mark above your eye that is getting the shot, and I told him about my husband as a kid getting novocaine in one side of his mouth and having a tooth pulled in the other side. He's still leery of dentists. Then he said when he was five his father told him not to have novocaine because it was bad for him, so he suffered every time he had a filling. When he was an adult, his same dentist asked him if he wanted a shot and he automatically said no. The dentist asked why and my doctor explained. The dentist said that was odd because his father always had novocaine. So my eye doctor had the shot and it was a miracle: no pain. Next time he saw his dad he asked him about it and his father swore he'd never told him not to have something for the pain. So my doctor realized he'd misunderstood and somehow withstood the discomfort his whole childhood because of the mixup.
Perhaps my doctor, who is Asian, said, it was my culture. No I replied. My family told us to buck up, not whine and soldier through, so I probably never would have questioned my understanding either. You did not go to my family for sympathy if you had a painful procedure (as I did when I had TB as a ten year old) or an authority disciplined you.
Maybe the lesson is double check the instruction you believe you have received. But a 5 year old would have a rough time questioning the big people. It's up to the parents to question their child's experiences enough to get a feel for what is happening. But often they just want to avoid that they've caused their kid some pain, and sweep it under the rug. Oh, well, we all survive. And eventually, we begin to question what we're told.
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