Wandering Along the Path: Right Speech

Today our little grandson was over, and he fought the good fight about taking a nap, but when he awoke, he was happy and curious and we took him out for lunch and a dozen people came over to talk to him as he ate sideways in the high chair.  He smiled, he made their day, and he was gracious.  We heard a white bearded man say his kids hadn't had kids, and I said it's never too late, and he said oh yes it is.  They're in their sixties!  Women fawned over him.  He left in triumph an hour later having eaten a pickle, a lot of bread, chicken, a sqeezie veggie thing, and assorted crackers.  I cleaned up the mess at his feet and we returned home to listen to the Old MacDonald puzzle that drives us crazy, read the same book ten times, race cars and pretend we were sipping tea.  His new thing is pointing his right index finger.  He's a genius.  Or at least highly entertaining.

Wandering Along the Path: Right Speech

Our beloved older daughter has had a return of her cancer and we are all struggling with what it means and what will happen.  The biopsy showed one small tumor, so if the test coming up show no other sites, we're hoping this will be swiftly and easily treated.  But it's agony to think she is going through this again after only four years, and our granddaughter is upset.  We are all stunned, and our daughter has a new job she adores, a new boyfriend, and so many plans, and we want all those plans to happen.  She heard this news on her birthday, and as she is a warrior, she was brave.  "Don't know" is a mantra of mine, so I'm practicing it:  no anticipation of what will be, just one day at a time.  But I know not only is she a fighter, but our whole family will fight with and for her.  She's our Wonder Woman.

Wandering Along the Path: Right Speech

I'm attempting to get back into the blog, after our dog dying suddenly, a wedding, fires threatening our older son's house, and other monkey wrenches thrown up in the air.  The wedding was beautiful, and I believe the couple was thrilled.  They are off on their honeymoon now, and hopefully blissful and rested.  Our guests are departed, our ordinary lives perhaps about to resume.  Or not.  We both miss our dog, and we are exhausted.  We are babysitting our grandson this week as his nanny is on vacation, and he's probably the best tonic.  We take him to the park and watch him watch the older children and play with trucks and walkers.  He loves wheels and pushing toys and can stand and walk holding onto a toy.  The wheels are churning his his rapidly growing brain.  He also has a new interest in being read to and is mimicing us in a delightful way.  He grounds us.  Our time with him is all about the simple and necessary.  Bigger issues must be put aside.  And that allows us to slowly absorb all that has happened in the last two weeks.

Wandering Along the Path: Right Speech

We took our dog in early for boarding, as she is uncomfortable.  We are at the stage of attempting to determine when she is so uncomfortable that she hasn't quality of life.  So far she seems okay, but she is restless at night and we had to give her more medication and then she was woosy.  At least she'll rest completely at the vet and not get overexcited and hurt herself.  But we know now that any day may be the day when the balance shifts and it's time to let her go.  This is happening while we prepare for the wedding and pick up guests, and we need our focus to be on our son.  But we're holding our dog in our hearts at the same time, and are torn.  I'm grateful she has had a long and good life.  She has been a great dog and an important part of our family.  Sigh.

Wandering Along the Path: Right Speech

I'm reading a memoir by Alice Waters that a friend lent me.  I want something far removed from this violent, harmful culture that we live in, and from the senseless deaths in Las Vegas and the impotent posturing in Washington, D.C.  This is about food and the love of creating meals for family and friends, and she is one year older than me, lives in my town and went to my University.  I want a respite from the darker side of humans.  She was an ordinary girl in every way, and she became extraordinary by luck, chance and grit.  I like the stories of ordinary heroes.  There are many all around us, and some them saved others in Las Vegas.  Ordinary is real, good and possible.  We don't need fame and attention like the President seems to, we just do the right thing, big and little, one moment at a time.

Wandering Along the Path: Right Speech

I'm jumpy!  I tend to have the delusion I'm responsible for everyone and everything, so the wedding coming up makes me wonder who wants to see who, what I should suggest and what I can do to facilitate a harmonious event.  Now, I'm not even the bride's mother, but I have the jitters.  I am also feeling this overwhelming need to protect, amplified by the horror in Las Vegas.  I want everyone safe and happy and yet, the world being what it is, darkness is always just on the edge of the horizon.  I remember when our older son married, it was ten days after 9/11, and we debated whether to cancel, or how it would impact travel, etc.  The consensus was to go ahead, and we did, but it was bittersweet.  Yet many guests told me they "needed" this joyful event to counter what had just happened.  Now there is this cloud of hurricanes, earthquakes and human malevolence in the air, yet we will be by the sparkling ocean celebrating two people joining their lives together.  Paradoxical, magical, touching and brave.

Wandering Along the Path: Right Speech

One thing I love about mystery series is how comfortable they can make you feel, like warm toasty slippers on a cold day.  I love the development of the main characters over a series of books, and how there are surprising discoveries even for a character you think you know, partly because no one is totally consistent, and also because it forces you not to become too complacent as a reader.  I finished Louise Penny's new book a month ago, and discovered after all this time, I don't really like her main character, Inspector Gamache.  That's okay, she has a large cast, but something that had been nagging me throughout the books came to the forefront in this one:  he's too rigid, and too bound by a moral standard that seems false or the result of inordinate pride.  He's tender hearted, so I appreciate that quality even more, but he irritates me as well.  And now I'm reading Craig Johnson's newest mystery about Walt Longmire, and all of a sudden, we get a picture of him when he was very young and first married, as well as the present older man thinking of retiring.  It's refreshing, and fleshes out his portrait in ways that expand the character interestingly. 
Well, I suppose in real life the same thing happens.  You think you know a friend, and they surprise you, or your feelings transform as time goes on.  We are not static; we are dynamic, changing beings and must be reckoned with again and again.  In great fiction, the characters are that fully human.