Wandering Along the Path: Right Speech

My grandson and I had a good day.  For the first time, he fell asleep while I was giving him the bottle, and I let him sleep in my arms.  He held my finger with his hand the whole time.  When we were strolling, he pulled forward to sit up more, and was looking at everything around him.  He usually falls asleep in the stroller, but he was curious and taking it all in.  I hadn't seen him in only four days, but he's changed, and relating to the world in different ways and absorbing all he can.  He had a couple of bouts of talking to me, and though I have no idea what he's telling me, I appreciate the fact that he wants to tell me.  He knows that is what it is to be human.  What a blessing I'm having this experience with my grandchildren:  seeing again what life is about and how amazing and precious it is!

Wandering Along the Path: Right Speech

I've just returned from a visit to my daughter and granddaughter.  Carefulness in right speech was foremost in my mind, and I feel all of us exerted right effort to make the visit loving and supportive.  Thus, during the long trip driving home, I had no regrets, and was not mulling over statements others said.  We're all square, as people used to say.  I'm happy with how the two of them are doing, and appreciate how rich their lives are and how blessed by friends and meaningful work and school.  They are thriving.  What more can any parent or grandparent ask?

Wandering Along the Path: Right Speech

We had a great time with our grandson on the weekend.  He is bubbling with enthusiasm about language and proud of his "words".  He has an amazing vocabulary for an eighteen month old, and when I brought him a barn he got that word instantly.  He called the cow a giraffe, and the dog a chicken.  I could see the cow's spots looked giraffey, and the dog had a ruff that was yellow.  I explained to him that chickens only had two legs, but he was undeterred.  Though this chicken had four legs and a long tail and a long snout, the coloring trumped the anotomical details.  He struggles pronouncing "grandma" and it comes out "grandem" or something similar.  He got the egg hunt, even though it was just him.  In fact, he found four eggs before we began the hunt.  He bit right into the shell of each.  With encouragement and a bit of guidance he found all eighteen and there they were, tucked in his basket, which he carried mightily despite the heaviness.  He was so exhausted, that after brunch he fell asleep in the carseat and didn't wake up for hours.  It was hard work, but he managed to entertain and delight us alal.

Wandering Along the Path: Right Speech

I'm talking a lot to my baby grandson and he is verbalizing right back.  I may not know what he's saying, but I'm certain he's communicating.  I repeat the sounds he makes, and he sometimes repeats my sounds.  Today I was showing him an owl finger puppet and saying "hoo" and he said it back.  What is going on in that little mind is pretty amazing.  I get to be a witness to the birth of language in a human, and how extraordinary it is.  He will recognize words soon, if not already, words like "mommy" and "daddy" and "kitty".  He knows already that his job is to master language and therefore make his needs known.  You can see him go on overwhelm when he's processing so much he can't take another thing in.  But there is joy.  He feels a part of it all:  his family and world.  The baby bird is chirping, and it is a song of humanity.

Wandering Along the Path: Right Speech

I just called to wish a friend happy birthday.  I always sing the song, silly as it is.  I figure as time goes on we don't necessarily get a cake, or have balloons, or have family around that day to sing to us, so I want to be sure that on the actual day, the person knows I'm celebrating their birth.  A lot of us are immersed in grandchildren's parties and piano recitals and baby showers and weddings, but our day gets lost in the shuffle.  I try to make up a bit for that.  The day a person is born is special, and one of the best reasons to celebrate that I can think of.  This person is in the world, and my world is the better for it.  Friends are important, or in my case, essential.  I don't take their presence for granted.  So if singing over the phone is ridiculous, I'm willing to be ridiculous.  My joy is in my family and friends.  They make my life richer and supported by love.

Wandering Along the Path: Right Speech

My husband and I babysat our grandson for a long period yesterday:  from 2:30 pm to 11:30 pm.  We strolled him and played on the floor, we walked him around and he looked at his favorite things in our house, but after one bottle and one nap he'd pretty much had enough, and began crying.  I knew what he was saying:  where's mommy and daddy and my house and my things and this has gone on TOO LONG!  I strolled him inside the house and he fell asleep for an hour, then woke up, took part of a bottle, I got him in his sleep gear, and he was DONE.  Luckily, it was around his bedtime, and my husband strolled him again.  I'd tried the bottle and portacrib, but no way.  This time I put the stroller next to my chair and proceeded to listen to him breathe and snore and murmur.  He did not wake up, having taken the hint that this was going to be a very long evening and he didn't chose to witness any of it.  When they finally arrived, daddy carried him out to the car still fast asleep.  He was not going to open his eyes until he was home, that was for sure.  My husband and I were exhausted, but relieved that baby had cooperated and seen the lay of the land.  When in doubt, hibernate!

Wandering Along the Path: Right Speech

Yesterday I had tea with an old friend from a Buddhist study group.  We have kids the same age, though her grandchildren are older.  We both have an interest in knitting, and we have been to many a retreat together over the years.  Now we are integrating our practice more directly into our lives, without the aid of time away.  She just had hip surgery and is doing well, and I had my knee brace on, so we know our limitations these days.  She had a sister who died, her only sibling, and I my brother.  We touch base on this loss usually, and yesterday was no exception.  And she has a daughter-in-law who is becoming more and more successful in the literary world, and I have a daughter on that road as well.  It's relaxing to discuss personal issues in a careful, non-gossipy way with another Buddhist who knows how to keep her intentions in mind.  I also had another day this week when I was with another Buddhist swim buddy, and our heartfelt talking was also carefully and gently framed by good intentions.  I'm easily distracted into gossip that may be harmful, so I appreciate the ease of these friends.  We know and understand the ground rules to speech.